Hmmmmmmmm just wondering

    • Anonymous
      July 25, 2006 at 8:41 pm

      Why is it that some people always say they “slept like a baby”, when babies wake up like every 2 hours?! How important does a person have to be before it’s called an assassination,rather than JUST a murder? Why is bra singular and panties is plural? Why does a doctor leave the room for you to get undressed when he is going to see you naked anyway? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm just wondering!

    • Anonymous
      July 25, 2006 at 9:38 pm

      [COLOR=red]You know what I wonder …[/COLOR]

      [COLOR=red][FONT=Comic Sans MS]If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?

      If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

      If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

      Is there another word for synonym?

      Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice?”

      When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

      Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all?”

      Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?

      What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

      If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

      Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

      Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

      If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

      If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

      Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?

      Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

      If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

      Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?

      How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

      Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

      Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

      Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?[/FONT]


    • Anonymous
      July 25, 2006 at 11:07 pm

      If Corn Oil Is Made From Corn, And Vegetable Oil Is Made From Vegetables, What Is Baby Oil Made From?

    • Anonymous
      July 26, 2006 at 4:17 pm

      *salutes Capin Dave*

    • Anonymous
      July 27, 2006 at 2:57 pm

      [COLOR=red][FONT=Arial]Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.[/FONT][FONT=Arial] Women like silent men, they think they’re listening.[/FONT][/COLOR]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]Do pediatricians play miniature golf on Wednesdays?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]If God dropped acid, would he see people?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial][COLOR=red]If you ate pasta and anti-pasta, would you still be hungry?[/COLOR][/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial]If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?[/FONT]
      [FONT=Arial]Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot at them?[/FONT]

    • Anonymous
      July 27, 2006 at 3:56 pm

      You are hilarious, Captain Dave! I leave this thread to you…………………

    • Anonymous
      July 27, 2006 at 4:10 pm

      [COLOR=red][B]1.[/B] Why do you park in a driveway and drive in a parkway?

      [B]2.[/B] Why do you have a hot-water heater when you dont need to heat hot water?

      [B]3.[/B] Why is an orange an orange and an apple not a red?

      [B]4.[/B] Why is a pear called a pear when there is only one?

      [B]5.[/B] What do they pack styrofoam in?

      [B]6.[/B] Why did God give men nipples?

      [B]7.[/B] If buttered toast always lands butter-side down, and a cat always lands
      on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast on
      the back of a cat?

      [B]8.[/B] Is grass really greener on the other side?

      [B]9.[/B] Do boxer shorts box?

      [B]10.[/B] Why do you wear a pair of panties and only one bra?


    • Anonymous
      July 31, 2006 at 5:22 pm

      [COLOR=red]Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If you can’t drink and drive, why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why is it that when you transport something by car, it’s called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it’s called cargo?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If a black box in a plane is indestructible, why can’t they make the whole plane out of it?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why is it that when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why is it so hard to remember how to spell ‘mnemonic’?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why is it called a TV “set” when you only get one?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why does your nose run and your feet smell?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why does an alarm clock “go off” when it begins ringing?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why does “cleave” mean both split apart and stick together?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why is there an expiry date on my sour cream container?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why call it a building if it’s already been built?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]How do you know when it’s time to tune your bagpipes?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Does ‘virgin wool’ come from sheep the shepherd hasn’t caught yet?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If the front of your car says ‘DODGE’, do you really need a horn?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]What do sheep count when they can’t get to sleep?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Does fuzzy logic tickle?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Do blind Eskimos heave seeing-eye sled dogs?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]How come wrong numbers are never busy?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why call it “take” a dump, when you leave something behind?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]What was the best thing before sliced bread?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]Why do we call it a hot water heater if the water is already hot?[/COLOR]
      [COLOR=red]If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?[/COLOR]