Jokes on my illness

This topic contains 5 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  B 6 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #111954

    Ariel.Dez
    Participant

    Hi everyone,
    im pretty young and resilient but I do get frustrated a lot when people ask me what my leg braces are for, or when I am using my wheel chair different people treat me like I have a mental handicap! but most of the time when I get questions that are outrageous I like to come up with silly answers!!! what are some silly things that you have come up with to mess with strangers about what’s going on? my favorite response (that might be a little morbid) is that I got hit by a train or mauled by a wild animal, people always seem to look so shocked! mostly because I would look far worse than I do.

    Give me some funny things you like to say to people about your condition! or maybe throw down your favorite joke, anything to lighten the mood a little 🙂

    #111955

    Jim-LA
    Participant

    I don’t know how funny this is, mostly sarcastic I think, it’s one of my pet peeves though.

    I have a power wheelchair and use it to drive from my house to the supermarket, about a mile away. When shopping, I never can reach anything on the top and bottom shelves (without an awkward reach tool). Have you noticed they always seem to put the heavy items on the top and bottom shelves, in an ADA compliant (supposedly) store? So frustrating!

    I have found that supermarket employees, even those stocking the shelves near me or manning the surveillance cameras on every aisle, won’t go out of their way to help me, or even ask if I need help (well, on RARE occasions). Shopping is one of those experiences those of us with CIDP related disabilities must tolerate if we wish to eat lol!

    So, I usually wait until a kind neighbor walks by and politely ask them to get the item for me. Most try to help as soon as they see me trying to grab something out of my reach. I always shower them with praises for their help!

    When checking out after shopping, the clerk typically asks me, “Do you need help out?”. Depending on my mood and my experience trying to get things from their shelves, I may say ‘yeah, I need help outa this life’ or ‘can you drive me home’ or ‘can you hang the bags on my wheelchair so I won’t tip over’. Sometimes, in a foul mood, I respond with ’what do you propose’ which usually gets a blank stare and/or a stuttering, apologetic response lol.

    OK, all this is fun for me, but probably not for store clerks. I bet others here in the forums can associate though, and I hope they get a kick out of my sarcastic humor!

    #112382

    Tom M
    Participant

    This is one of those where you might had to have been there to find it funny… BUT…. I was in the shower one morning and was having what I call a bad ‘leg’ day. It’s when my legs aren’t listening to my brain and my balance is really bad.

    Anyways, as I stated I was in the shower and was trying to turn around. When I turn around in the shower, I have to hug the wall and turn very, very slowly so I don’t fall. I sort of slipped a little (without falling) and my wife heard it and asked if I was okay. I said, “Yes, I am fine…but I turn slower than a rotisserie chicken”! 🙂 We both started laughing a lot. A good laugh took the frustration away.

    #112419

    B
    Participant

    Hi Jim-LA. You post on here quite frequently and often help others, including me with questions (thank you!). You’re obviously tech-savvy, so have you tried online grocery ordering? Our local store allows us to order online, and then pick up curb-side. When I’ve had relative mobility problems, I’ve done that on occasion. They also can deliver. Just a thought — hope you don’t mind the unsolicited suggestion.

    #112422

    Jim-LA
    Participant

    Thanks for the suggestion B! I have two markets within wheeling distance of me (Von’s and Smart & Final). One offers delivery if the value is $49+ and I order before 8:30AM. The other store offers delivery through Instacart or Google Express, both charge a fee for delivery and have deadlines. I guess where I live isn’t as progressive as where you live. What super markets offer the service in Denver?

    Anyhow, I kinda enjoy going into the store and being grumpy with em. Especially when I’m blocked by their aisle displays sitting right in front of the item I want to purchase (blocking me from reaching ANY shelf) and finding things on the top and bottom shelves beyond my reach. I guess I need one of those electric chairs that elevate or stand me up.

    #112430

    B
    Participant

    King Soopers (Kroger) has Clicklist which is $5 and I get all of the sale prices and frequent shopper discounts. Instacart is more pricey and their selection is limited. Clicklist has your in store shopping history, so I can quickly order the exact products I buy frequently without having to sort through the product data.

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