update/pity party

:confused: still having to go often but seem to have more control. Numbness still is annoying. working out at the Y a couple times a week. Maybe by working out i am more aware of the numbness. who knows. i guess this is my life now.This sucks. I want to go back to normal.i guess i feel like throwing myself a pity party tonight. Sometimes i get so frustrated. why me. what does this all mean? if there is a life lesson somewhere here i should have gotten it by now. I miss my old life not just pre GBS but pre BIpolar. What happened to my life? I look at my friends and see what seems to be pretty good lives. Husbands, kids and jobs. sometimes i get so depressed with thinking about what could have been and now what is going to be.i dont mean to be a whiner, i said it was going to be a pity party. thanks for letting me vent.