Mom has very hard day

Well yesterday was the first day I had seen my mother to the point where she could not stop crying for pretty much the duration of the day. My dad called me about 2 in the afternoon and said mom was having a very hard day and asked if I could come down (Even though my mom did not want me to see her so upset) I went down and walked in they were trying to get her comfortable and she was just sobbing. She has been so brave so far I have not seen a tear (from her) but yesterday she just lost it. She is so flustrated with the slow progress (Yet there is progress) She just wants to go home she says. She asked them to take her off the vent but when they explained to her she would die she fortunately changed her mind. She is so overwhelmed with sadness and flustration. She cant’ believe the time it is taking to get use of her hands back and to be able to be off the vent. The Physical Therapist can feel muscle movement in her upper arms and she is getting stronger in the upper part of her body. They have had her on the tilt table every day and she is up to 35 min. and today they had her in a chair position for about 1 hr. she tolerated that well. They are now giving her a different nerve med. (I cant remember the name starts with a L. ) and this seems to help her more and not sedate her as much. I know part of the reason she is struggling so much right now is that in the month of Sept. is all my kids (4) b-days. She has always been such a part of there lives and previous b-days she really misses that. I do take the kids in often expecially my youngest 5 whom she is very close to. On there b-days I take them to see her so she can see them and wish them a happy b-day. Anyway, we both shared a lot of tears yesterday even my dad who has been a hero in my eyes with her. He is there every day from 12:00 – 8:00 and he is her advocate. He even shed a few. I know we will have hard days along with good and fortunately today was a good day. Saturday is my parents 46 wedding anniversay and my dad is throwing her a dinner in the cafeteria he has made arrangements for the Resp. therapist to be there so she can be by some great big windows and see outside and be with family. So to get her ready for Saturday my sister in law came and did her hair and I shaved her legs. We did get a good laugh out of that. I have never shaved anyone elses legs and I got shaving cream all over myself it was good to see her laugh so hard even at my expense. So we did have a better day today. I just keep telling her next Sept. we will all feel more like celebrating and we will have some great parties next year when she is home maybe not 100% but happy and home. Anyway, thanks again for taking the time to write back and thanks as always for your advice and kind words.

Thanks again,
Dawna