Thank you so much for all your replies, but I give.

I saw yet another Dr. yesterday, and nothing…………nothing new to add, nothing to say about past, nothing about the future, just a bunch of……….” well let me wait until your other 10 Drs send me all of your records since June of 2006, then I will see you back here in 8 weeks. I hated to be so rude, but I actually laughed. I’m done……….no more meds that cost me 400+ dollars per month, no more co-pays for Dr. visits to specialists to whom I am a number and perhaps a car payment if they keep me coming back every 4-6 weeks. And no more of that “search” for someone who can make this better.
I started a slow taper on all my meds yesterday, and guess what, I still woke up this morning. Will it get worse? Probably a lot worse, but it can’t possibly be any worse than I have felt over the past 2-3 weeks.
I’ve done this twice now: In 1991 it hit me hard and I was on a vent, and 6 months later I was back to work and going to college. This time “it wasn’t so bad”, and I’m over a year out and almost nothing has changed. I’d take 91 again, hands down over this. 😡