My pain control
It’s been a year since my last entry here. I see that it’s no more cheery now than it was then. Still it’s the only place where anyone understands what it’s like to be me. I’m over three years post GBS onset. My residuals have been constant since the day I checked out of the hospital. My neurologist has cut my visits down to less than once a year because she says there is nothing more that can be done for me. I am assisted with a cane when in public in the hopes it saves me from the embarassment of falling down. I have been on 5400mg of Neurontin daily for nearly three years. One month I cut back to 900 but wish to never relive that painful episode again. My feet are the worst, feeling like pins and needles and the size of basketballs. My whole body tingles constantly, hands and face being the worst. Mornings, upon waking, are the worst. My balance is poor and every exertion quickly causes tiredness. I’m lucky if I can cope for an hour shopping before having to rest the remainder of the day. If I get out for longer then it takes days to recover. I havn’t been able to drive for nearly three years and most likely won’t ever again.
Now, considering all those GBS derived neuropathies try to imagine severe Juvenile Diabeties on top of it. I take one unit insulin for every five grams of carb intake and forty six units of Lantus every night. I believe I could handle the GBS residuals forever but the diabetes is killing me. When my blood sugar gets low I just fall down and can’t move. It is the scariest feeling ever. Some days I think I……(never mind). If it weren’t for my ageing mother assisting me I doubt I would be enduring all this. Now I’m depressed again and reminded why I stopped coming here a year ago.