What Kids say
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AnonymousApril 24, 2008 at 8:18 am
Little Johnny’s neighbor had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears.
When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny’s family was invited over to see the baby.
Before they left their house, Little Johnny’s dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears.
His dad mentioned that if he so much as hinted anything about the baby’s missing ears or even said the word ears he would get the spanking of his life. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely.
When Johnny looked in the crib he said, “What a beautiful baby.” The new mother said, “Why, thank you, Little Johnny.”
Johnny said, “He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes.” “Can he see?” asked Little Johnny.
“Yes”, the mother replied, “we are so thankful; the Doctor said he will have 20/20 vision.”
“That’s great”, said Little Johnny, “cuz he’d be in trouble if he needed glasses!”
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AnonymousMay 15, 2008 at 11:34 pm
A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. “What are you doing?” his mother asked. “The box says not to eat them if the seal is broken” the boy explained. “I’m looking for the seal.”
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AnonymousJune 15, 2008 at 9:09 am
A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. “What are you doing?” his mother asked. “The box says not to eat them if the seal is broken” the boy explained. “I’m looking for the seal.”
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AnonymousJune 19, 2008 at 1:15 am
One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, “…. and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, “The sky is falling, the sky is falling!” The teacher paused then asked the class, “And what do you think that farmer said?” One little gir l raised her hand and said, “I think he said: ‘Holy Cow! A talking chicken!'”
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AnonymousJuly 4, 2008 at 8:30 pm
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. “If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, ‘Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait.'” Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, “Ryan, you be Jesus.
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AnonymousJuly 10, 2008 at 12:59 am
A mother was away one weekend at a business conference. During a break, she decided to call home collect. Her six-year-old son picked up the phone and heard a stranger’s voice say “We have a Marcia on the line. Will you accept the charges?” Frantic, he dropped the phone and ran outside screaming, “Dad! Dad! They’ve got mom!! And they want money!!!”
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AnonymousSeptember 14, 2008 at 7:44 pm
One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, “…. and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, “The sky is falling, the sky is falling!” The teacher paused then asked the class, “And what do you think that farmer said?” One little gir l raised her hand and said, “I think he said: ‘WOW! A talking chicken!'”
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AnonymousSeptember 18, 2008 at 4:57 pm
After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.
At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.
As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, “Who was that?”
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