Reversal By: Elaine Sparrow 9/09

Anonymous
January 17, 2010 at 7:19 pm

From the Winter newsletter:
Reversal
Elaine Sparrow 9/23/09

The acrid smell of alcohol
burned her sensitive nose.

Grey-green walls and floor to ceiling
windows
with automatic blinds that closed
against the bright sunshine
casting shadows of machines, desks,
chairs, beds and a tube

A breathing tube
cycling on and off
breathing in, breathing out
keeping a young girl alive.

White coats and green scrubs
“Martians working from outside the
spaceship”, she thought.

“Where am I”?

A young girl, 19, paralyzed.
Smelling, hearing
unable to move.

Tears on my face
trapped inside

People on the outside
poking and prodding
working to keep me alive.

Stuck, trapped in this room
the tube room
my life support.

Voices described my condition,
staff dressed in white
caring for my needs.

Eyes not seeing.
Mouth not speaking.
Skin not feeling.

Ears hearing, mind fearing,
I left
All went black.
In fear I left.

Nutrients dripping into my veins
flowing through my body.

I waited.
In the unknown and
unknowable darkness
I waited alone for this unnamed illness
to reverse its hold on my body.

I waited.
For my body to accept itself.
To own itself once more.

And then one day the sun came out ~

My finger moved
I wiggled my ear

Emotions, so many emotions.

The long road back had begun.