Answering my own question.

I have met two people who have recovered fully. What is full? They walked into my hospital room to visit me on their own two feet. One had an 8 month episode and the other was 2.9 years. I don’t know what their residuals were and I did not ask. Both were in their fifties. One lady and one man. I’m in my 19th month of illness and using a walker to get around safely because I have not healed from below the knees downward and remain with drop feet. At the end of the day these legs feel no different than the dining room table legs. So I wait and wonder: is this the best I will ever do? My Neuro tells me that the longer you go, the less your chances for a full recovery. I know things could be worse in life, but of course I am just concerned with myself. Should I feel guilty about that? I don’t think so. I hate this illness and my heart aches for those worse than me. I have given up the anger because it saps your energy: a word of advice to others. And self-pity can pull you into a dark hole. It is a trick to stay buoyant, a balance between being grateful for other things and saying to yourself “it could be worse” which is solely your personal province to say. Meanwhile, I thank you for your answers to my question?